Nights

What I am to you is not real 
What I am to you, you do not need 
What I am to you is not what you mean to me
                            ---------- From "Volcano" by Damien Rice

It is the same night. Same as a thousand other nights. And I cannot find sleep.

In the silence within the rain outside I cannot stop thinking about what I have lost. So I go out to the porch facing the waves on the beach with my bottle of Talisker for company. So many years have now passed since we met and parted. It is a story that I cannot forget and that you won't remember.

The rain is particularly vicious tonight, beating down all around the house. There is a palpable disquiet in the air. Even the waves seem subdued, washing listlessly up the beach. Surrounded by water, I sit drenched in remembering. Without you my love, where else can my mind go in this world? There is no desire but the one for you. Draining my glass of whisky in one fiery futile attempt to quench my longing, I lean back and close my eyes and wait to hear your footsteps.

It is the same night. Same as a thousand other nights. And I can't find my way to you.